In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
