sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
