so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Randomize
