does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is her dick bigger than yours?
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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