Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
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