I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
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