she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
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