He asked me if I "almost moaned"
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize
