I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
