two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
