No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
