Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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