if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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