Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize