Tell her she can't have a vagina
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
