I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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