You just made me feel so damn special
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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