this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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