New low: just hacked my moms facebook
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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