Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
