i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
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