yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize