just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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