Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
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