Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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