she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize