Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Randomize
