Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
