You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
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