I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
