we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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