am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Can you bring me the toilet please
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
