I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
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I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
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He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
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