I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
