I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
