then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
