whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
