I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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