3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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