dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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