We're facebook friends in real life
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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