Porn is love you can see.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Randomize
