plz talk dirty to me
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
This beer is not sobering me up at all
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize
