I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
vagina is talking i cant
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
