dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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