this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
FUCK WHALES
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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