Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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