and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
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Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
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I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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