Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Randomize
