you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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