how can u be prego again
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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