just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Come share oat with me in your robe
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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