Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
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